[Report This]Date: Mar 23, 2013 08:52 pm Title: Chapter 1
Love the banner try to read story.
[Report This]Date: Mar 22, 2013 07:48 pm Title: Chapter 4
Aww there just to cute! :) lol
Continue darling
GO GO GO!
Author's Response:
thanks :D
Date: Mar 22, 2013 07:46 pm Title: Chapter 4
aaaww so cute
Author's Response:
Ikr :D
[Report This]Date: Mar 20, 2013 10:29 pm Title: Chapter 3
Awww they watched PeterPan together that was sweet i like how there bonding!
Continue darling and GO GO GO!
[Report This]Date: Mar 20, 2013 10:27 pm Title: Chapter 2
Loved it and Michael is so sweet on helping July. This chapter was good!
[Report This]Date: Mar 20, 2013 10:25 pm Title: Chapter 1
I'm hooked already! :)
Author's Response:
thats good :D
Date: Mar 20, 2013 02:51 pm Title: Chapter 2
Good start :D I suggest that you split up the paragraph since it's mainly script, it'll make the story easier to read. Paragraphs work better if you are describing a scene rather then the back and forth of conversation.
Here's an example for you:
Michael said "whats the matter?"
the girl said "I got abused by my stepfather"
Michael felt so horrible and sad "come on, you can stay with me"
the girl said "really?"
Michael said "yeah of course why not"
and so on......
Looking forward to seeing the story develope :D
Author's Response:
Thank you :)
Date: Mar 20, 2013 02:20 pm Title: Chapter 1
Good title, add a comma (Don't give up, give love a try) :D
Looking forward to the first chapter!
Author's Response:
Oh Okay thanks for the advice :P and chapter 1 is going be up :P
[Report This]Date: Mar 20, 2013 02:17 pm Title: Chapter 1
Aww sweet i wanna be the girl! :P lol
Author's Response:
awwh :D