The bright red numbers of my alarm clock burned my heavy blue eyes. According to the clock it had just hit midnight. I should’ve gone to sleep hours ago but I just couldn’t. I could not get my mind off of my argument with Harry. I was still in shock about everything he’d said to me. It really hurt my heart to know that the boy who once thought I could do no wrong now thought so poorly of me. What hurt even more was knowing that I was the one who’d made him feel so insignificant.
Harry had been the apple of my eye all his life. I honestly don’t know what I’d do without him. I’d still be the obnoxious, selfish woman that I once was. Being a mother to him was the best thing that ever happened to me and to find out that he thinks I don’t care about him anymore breaks my heart. I can’t even begin to think where I went wrong. At any other time like this, I’d sit down and talk to Harry. But right now I bet he’d rather die before uttering a word to me. Harry had been in his room all day. The only time he’d made an appearance was for dinner. Even then Harry didn’t even speak to me. He just took his plate from the table and went back to his room slamming the door behind him. I bet he didn’t even noticed that I put extra effort into making sure dinner wasn’t burnt and edible. Harry hates me.
I sighed turning on my side while staring into the dark. I really needed someone to talk to right now. I’d love to have Jacob by my side right now but I didn’t quite know how to explain to him that Harry was basically leaving because of our relationship. Brooke wouldn’t be a reliable person right now. According to her, her children were perfect. And I didn’t quite know how Mother would react to all this. That meant there was just one other person left.
Michael.
So yes, it was true that Michael and I hadn’t had the best track record lately but as long as I’d known him he’d always been willing to lend a friendly ear whenever I needed one. He might have been an ass but he was a great friend.
I reached over and grabbed my cell phone off of my nightstand. I knew Michael’s number by heart and I didn’t hesitate to dial it. I nervously chewed on my bottom lip praying that Michael would answer. I know it was late but it was Saturday night and Michael was a very light sleeper. After about 3 more rings my prayers were answered. “Hello?” A soft, groggy voice answered. “Mike.” I replied simply. Michael groaned. “Erin?” He asked. I sighed “Yeah, it’s me.” I replied earning another groan from Michael. “What on God’s green earth are you doing up so late, girl? Don’t you like your beauty rest?” He questioned. His voice seemed more alert than before. “Take a walk with me.” I suddenly commanded.
There was a lull of silence on the other line. “Are you on drugs Erin? That boyfriend of yours must have you tripped out on something. Don’t you know it’s midnight?” Michael asked followed by a yawn. I rolled my eyes. “No I am not on drugs and yes I know it’s late. I can’t sleep and I really need someone to talk to. Just meet me at the park. Please?” I begged. I was really feeling low right now. All I needed was a friend.
“We’re talking now, Erin.” He replied sleepily. I sighed.”Michael, I know you’ll just go to sleep. I wanna see your face. C’mon, be a good friend.” I whined. I knew I’d hit his vanity point. Michael sighed. “Fine. But don’t expect me to be on time.” He replied. I grinned. “I’m never on time. It doesn’t matter anyway.” I replied happily as I threw back the covers. “See you in a few.” I spoke into the receiver. “Yeah, sure.” Michael replied sleepily before hanging up the phone. Now, to clear my mind.
***********
Usually lively Central park was dead as I crept across the green lawn. I was actually surprised at how quiet the city was tonight. There was no sirens, no loud music, shouting or any of the other noises that you typically heard during the day. Just the chirping of crickets as a few taxis breezing by.
There were a few lamp post illuminating the park so I looked around to see if I saw any sign of Michael. He told me not to expect him to be on time but he’s just being grumpy. He’s always on time. That’s just the way he’s programmed. Suddenly my view is blocked by a pair of large hands covering my eyes. My heart dropped. How stupid of you Erin! No one in their right mind would go out past midnight in New York. It’s not even completely safe in broad daylight! The odds of getting raped, mugged or kidnapped are endless. You should know this; you’re a Native New Yorker!!
A pair of strong arms pulls me in close. “Guess who?” A deep voice booms. I panicked and didn’t hesitate to resist stranger. My arms and fist began failing wildly in every direction but the stranger was stronger. I didn’t bring my purse with me so I didn’t have the mace or the pocket knife I usually had with me just in case something like this did happen. Finally, I did the only thing left that I could possibly do; I took the heel of my foot and aimed it upwards into the person’s groin. The hands immediately left my eyes and my assaulter groaned loudly. “Damn Erin, it was just me.” A very familiar voice croaked. I spun around and set my sights on Michael who crouched in pain while holding his crotch.
“Michael! Don’t sneak up on me like that! Do it again and you’re asking to get your ass kicked!!” I shouted tucking a stray strand of hair from my face. My heart beat was becoming normal again. Michael had given me quite the fright.”God woman! I got out of my warm bed to meet you here and this is the thanks I get??” He asked. I folded my arms. “Sorry. You asked for it.” I replied sheepishly. Michael just stood there, wincing and griping. Once the pain seemed to subside, he spoke.
“So, I can already tell you’re not in the greatest of moods. Plus, you look a mess. What’s eating ya?” Michael asked taking a seat on one of the park benches. I guess he was still in too much pain to walk. I sat next to him and sighed, talking in a deep breath before I let out all my problems. “Is this about that boyfriend of yours, Julius?” He asked. I guess I didn’t reply quickly enough for him. I rolled my eyes. “No, this is not about Jacob. It’s about Harry. He’s pissed at me.” I replied softly folding my arms across my chest in an attempt to keep myself warm from the night chill. I was still in my pajamas. I didn’t even bother to put on real clothes. “Pissed at you? What did you do?” Michael ask glancing over at me. I sighed again while staring out into the darkness. “I forgot to pick Harry up from the school after he came back from an out of town trip with his team. I slept in that morning and it totally slipped my mind. When he did get home he completely blew up on me and told me that I don’t care about him anymore.” I replied recalling the events.
“I’m guessing Harry’s feeling left out now that Justin’s in the picture.” Michael replied. I sighed. “I suppose he is. I don’t want Harry to feel that way. I admit, maybe I do get carried away with Jake sometimes but it doesn’t mean I don’t love Haz anymore.” I replied glancing at Michael. His face held a sympathetic expression. “Harry’s a kid. He sees it differently.” He replied. I sighed. “Unfortunately. He was so ugly to me Michael. He made me feel so small. He even said he was going to live with Leif.” I spoke sadly. Michael’s eyes widened. “You mean, he’s been talking to Leif? No one’s heard anything about him in ages. I’m surprised the shaggy haired bastard’s still alive.” He replied bluntly. Michael was never the biggest fan of my choice in Leif but he didn’t do much to intervene since he was so caught up with Brooke around the time we got serious. The day that Leif abandoned Harry and I Michael was seeing red. I’m surprised he didn’t hunt him down and kill him.
“I knew this would happen. I’ve feared it for years. That Harry would leave me for Leif. Ever since Leif left I’ve strived to be nothing but the very best parent I can be to Harry but I feel like I’ve failed.” I declared tearfully. The tears felt hot and foreign falling down my face. It’d been forever since I’d actually sat down and cried. I was so used to repressing my feelings and emotions in order to appear strong for Harry. But right now I didn’t really care. It had all built up and the dam had finally broken.
“I try to be a good parent. I really try Michael. All these years I’ve put my life on hold for Harry. Is it so wrong to want to focus on me for once? Does wanting to have my own sense of happiness make me a terrible mother?? Is it too much to ask for something great??” I sobbed running my fingers through my hair in frustration. Michael sighs pulling me close to him and I could feel a familiar sense of warmth wash over me. I’d been forever since Michael had actually shown me some friendly affection. The last few months had been filled with bickering and anger. It felt nice to have my friend back. “ Erin, how could you say you’re a bad mother? You’re one of the best and strongest mothers I know. It’s hard to raise a kid on your own and I’d say you’ve done a darn good job of it.” He replied.
“Harry said it without saying it. He thinks Leif will be a better parent than me.” I replied, the tears still rolling down my cheeks. “Let Harry go live with Leif. You can’t keep him from his father forever. Plus it’ll allow him to see that the grass is not always greener on the other side. I can guarantee that Leif’s not half the parent you are.” Michael replied. Leif lived all the way in London. The distance from New York and London was tremendous and Harry was so young but Michael did have a valid point.
I slowly pulled away from him whipping the tears from my face. Michael quickly replaced my hands with is, gently whipping my tears away with his thumb. He may be an ass at times but he was one of the most caring people I’d known “Sorry.” I apologized sheepishly. For some strange reason I felt myself blushing. Michael cupped my face with one of his hands. “Don’t apologize.” He whispered whilst staring into my eyes. I’ve always thought his eyes were so pretty. I must have gotten lost in them because the next thing I know, Michael’s leaning in and his lips are touching mine. This was wrong. I belonged to Jacob. What we had was beautiful and I wasn’t going to mess it up. I instantly pulled away.
“We can’t do that Michael.” I spoke softly pushing him away. I couldn’t help but feel angry at him. He knows that I’m with Jake yet he’s still trying to toy with my emotions. Michael sighed deeply. “I couldn’t help it.” He replied. I quickly rose from my spot on the bench. “Thanks so much for the advice Michael. You’re a great friend.” I spoke adding emphasis on the word friend. I smiled at him before walking away, folding my arms across my chest to keep warm. Friends was all I wanted us to be. Friends was all we needed to be.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Hi readers!! I'm back with another update! I don't think it's my best but it's an update never the less! I hope you'll enjoy and please don't forget to review!!
Chapter End Notes:
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