Date: Feb 01, 2016 05:51 am Title: The Anatomy of Mikegasm - Seven oddly sensual pics
Number 4 gets to me all the time! And it doesn't help that he looks amazing in all of them. Okay, I'm in need of holy water right now ~fans self.
What really amazes me is how he could effortlessly look sexy. He could be just standing somewhere, smiling... he could be dancing his ass off and look as fine as hell. Even when he is sad, angry, pensive etc, he manages to look beautiful.
"And I'm sure we have all strained our eyes to try to see under that strip of cloth in the yana video - again, not judging."
LOL, the struggle. Me neither. Been there, still there. :D
Author's Response:
Hahahah! The struggle is real. Michael is/was the hotness! And beautiful inside and out <3
Date: Feb 01, 2016 05:40 am Title: No one like Mike - Seven Reasons Michael Rocks My World
Hey,
I hope I'm not late in replying :)
Gaaah! I agree with you 100000%! You really said what I feel about him. I loved how you've explained your reasons for loving Michael. His beauty (in and out), sensitivity, love for people of the world, respect towards women, his voice...smile..eyes....etc. and many more!
I've been a fan since I was 3/4 years old. It has been great journey and I find myself loving him more and more as the years go by.
Thank you for expressing what millions of fans would.
Author's Response:
Hey!!! Thank you for the love :) Michael . . . Sigh . . .he really was something else <3
Date: Feb 01, 2016 01:47 am Title: Michaelgate
I am actually gong to look into this, very interesting and it's abouut time that we have a documentary that proves this whole extortion attempt was a giant lie. t has my support im going to look for the GoFundMe page later on today here!
btw: I wouldn't delete this blog, if anything even though peole may not comment, it is still being read :) I think you're rather interesting t say the least. and to be quite honest, there could be some like myself who discover your art and reay like what you create and become curious abut the erson behind the fiction (Your descrotions and writing style as you know im a dire hard fan of haha) so just because it hasn't reached the masses so fr doesn't ean it wont. Haha Rome wasnt built and suceeded overnight right?
:)
Author's Response:
That's true, lol! Thank you so much for the encouragement. And I really appreciate you looking into this campaign. This thing is quite important to me. I want the truth about Michael to finally be told so effing bad! I want to shout it on the streets with a megaphone. Of course I won't do that though, lol!
Date: Feb 01, 2016 01:41 am Title: Total frustration and 5 reasons why I can't make it through the night
Excuse me ingesting everything that you have written. Allow me to be very serious for the moment.
1. I know exactly how you feel. on more than just this surfaced level. I felt like I was readig my own story. I am not speaking like someone whos just trying to identify but really I live this on a daily. I have kept with me several bottles of Over the counter generic liquid gel sleeping medication because I cannot get an ounce of sleep and if I do fall asleep it doesn't last but for an hour. Usually then I m groggy, sick to my stomach, and wide awake. I can already tell that these will not be enough and I have been on the verge of getting something stronger like Ambian. Currently, I have ingested 3 pills already that would usually put me to sleep and here I am at 3:32am lol go figure right?
I am sorry you seem to be not only battling with Anxiety (I understand you) but also with a compromised immune ystem that seems to put you in some issues. I know you didn't meantion anything as far as what you have beause I know its conidered "classified" information not to be shared wth the internet however, I get a sense if your anything like myself is there a chance for fibromyalgia?? It's awful and nothing seems to help.
You know I know life ad work seems to be a burden, and honestly it brings a sense of worry when you mention giving up on life, I know this blog entery is rather old howver it still worries me I hope you are currently doing much better!
For the record, I wouldn't worry about scaring people away, I wouldn't worry rather or not what you write about your life is either sad and depressing. It's sort of what life is.. Life is cruel, unfair, a pain in the ass and quite messy. I can't envision life being any different, exclusing the good days and happy moments. :) :) Givin you a virtual hug Miss! Hope things are in a better contrast to this!
Author's Response:
Thank you lady luv <3 When I first wrote that, no one gave a crap, lol. It sucks that you can empathize on a personal level, cuz I know this is not easy for anyone :(
Fibromyalgia was one guess . . .no one knows exactly what's wrong with me besides the spinext and knee injury from a car accident. From that I have chronic pain. From the chronic pain, I have a vicodin addiction. You know how it goes lol. But yes, I am doing much better emotionally these days, so no worries, k?
The thing about Ambien: I can definitely empathize with the sleeplessness. I've had insomnia since I was a kid. I have suffered with it my whole life. Ambien has given me a chance to have a life, to keep a job, to take care of my kid. I need the stuff, so I'm never going to be free of it. It is a great medicine, it can give you your life back, but you will never again be able to sleep without it :/ You have to weigh the pros and cons.
Thank you so much for all the love! Big virtual hugs coming your way :) ((( )))
Date: Feb 01, 2016 01:25 am Title: My Michael Drawings
I absolutey love these!! It's not often I get to see Art from th fans!
I love Your work with TDCABU. The colors are very rich, im also loving the fact that as a fellow artist myself it's very difficult to try and draw that particular image! Very intense skill set to be able to! Its my favorite one that you've drawn here and the porprotions in this one s very nice!
You should definately continue on with your artwork! What are the mediums that you use? usually work with Graphite and sometimes Charcoal lol I haven't drawn in so long, but the last Jackson drawing I created was in 2010:
http://i64.tinypic.com/8y9dsy.jpg
I suddenly fell away from drawing but this certainly inspires me.
I should have known because of your artistic mind that you dwelled in this realm also! Please dont delete this blog, it's refreshing to be able to know who is behind the writing and artesty!
I have drawn more since then :)
Author's Response:
Thank you so much! Unfortunately I couldn't see your pic when I pasted that link into the browser :( I'm so glad you like my drawings, luv. I use charcoal, pencil and chalk pastel.
Date: Jan 31, 2016 09:48 pm Title: Michaelgate
Hey thank u so much for sharing this! I had no idea someone wrote a book about it especially from that perspective. Like wow. I tweeted it. That film definitely needs to happen. I also tagged this one girl who got the video about Michael clearly stating he would never want to be portrayed by a white person in a commercial and getting news organizations to talk about it, to fight thia disgusting comedy tv film about a road trip that supposedly happened after 9/11, with Elizabeth Taylor, Marlon Brando, and MJ. Which never happened btw. They cast Joseph Fiennes to play Michael. How fucked up is that? This girl pretty much hates me I think cuz I defended my friend who called her out on her bullshit observations about race issues and how she attacks and bullies people but shes got several thousand followers and got several news organizations to talk about the video of MJ in the '92 Oprah interview about how he feels about being portrayed by a white person despite being black. Whatever hopefully she can get over herself and say something about it. Anyway i saw in the reviews u commented on in on ur first story that you think Michael is bipolar why do you think so? I dont see it at all. He was horribly abused with corporal punishment by that fucking bastard Joseph and then forced in front of a camera having to pretend like everythings fine. Ya anyone wud be pretty damaged and traumatized after that.
Author's Response:
Thank you so much fire! I really appreciate you looking into this and sharing!
I would love to see this happen! Michael is like a saintly figure to me (weather that's healthy or not lol). His legacy is sacred to me . This undeserved pedophile stigma has to go, otherwise it's like the evil bastards won :(
And I know the pain and humiliation killed him. Imagine being branded as a depraved child abuser for life. I think I'd rather die. It caused his drug problem to spiral out of control and it killed him. I really think so. Promoting the truth is the least we can do, I feel.
Michael as bipolar: Look, maybe I should take that back. I am not a doctor by any means, it's just a theory. I thought he was bipolar because many geniuses actually are. It's their overactive brain that causes the excessive energy, sleeplessness, obsessiveness, perfectionism to the point of self-harm, etc.
Then there's the crippling depression side of it. I'very read that he used to go into really horrible depressive moods, and take drugs, and cry, and not eat, etc.
Of course these things can be symptoms of having been abused, especially to the level that he was. His father was a cruel bastard - I don't think anyone has ever argued that point, lol!
Date: Oct 16, 2015 06:45 pm Title: My Michael Drawings
beautiful
Author's Response:
Thank you honey :)
Date: Oct 15, 2015 07:30 am Title: My Michael Drawings
I absolutely LOVE the second to last one!! Its fucking gorgeous. Better than the photograoh you referenced honestly. The coloring is amazing what medium did you use? Him taking the shades off one. The 5th one from the top is gorgeous i would fix the nose though its a bit too widr, i LOVE how his closed eye looks and the overall hue and jeweled blue purple tone to it. I like that the 2 i mentioned rnt in black or white but the positive & negative space is still used the same. Ya im an artist too. I drew his eyes once but damn i wayyy envious of those works! The shading in the 4th one from the top is impeccable the nose could be fixed a bit, but overall theres this really cool dark rocknroll mood to it. Also LOVE the 2nd one where his head is thrown back. You can really see the strength in his neck & body there & just overall its a stunning piece. Not brown nosing i swear. Theres a lot of melancholy to most of these but this one is just 🙌🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👍🏼👌🏽👌🏽👌🏽. Cant believe im saying this but i actually love the first one because it so doesnt look like him but the message of his song is really prominent and there. Hes clearly resisting the strength of those handcuffs holding him back. My suggestion with the 3rd one is just throw some shades over his eyes dont focus on what his eyes & nose look like try to convey that sadness, that aura of defeat and broken down despair without showing his eyes. U can show that in what position he has his mouth in, pursed, or sighing exhausted. The eyes you have for that one are too small & disproportionate to the rest of his face. I get that hes at a weird angle there but they could be covered up like i suggested or whatever. Theyre too close together, his eyes they need to be spaced wider there. The very last one doesnt look like him at all the coloring is beautiful though, youre really good st the jawline and chin, the lips are too big so he looks too feminine, the eyes are gorgeous but not quite his. The scream one, while the coloring is pretty thr face is really disproportionate, the eyes arent the same size and shape, the left looks bigger than the right. Lips look better in this. Again the nose needs work but i guess it all depends on how realistic you want these to look. Thanks for sharing!
Author's Response:
Brown nose? You? Pfft! Lol! Thank you very much for your honesty and compliments. I use charcoal, soft chalk pastel and pencil. I am a little surprised to hear that the first and last don't look like like him. I agree about the noses - they are the most difficult things to draw, like ever! I see how some are disproportionate. I have to keep practicing. Thank you very much for the critiques, it's very helpful :)
Date: Oct 15, 2015 03:38 am Title: My Michael Drawings
i like em, i love the way you blend colours, you aren't afraid to draw him in your style! what medium did you use for most of em?i'm way too scared to touch him in my drawings lol.
Author's Response:
Thanks! I use charcoal, soft chalk pastel, and pencil. I don't worry about messing up. That’s how you learn :)
Date: Oct 09, 2015 07:02 pm Title: No one like Mike - Seven Reasons Michael Rocks My World
No worries about the photo. I'd definitely push for couples....It's hard to be a wife and mother when substances have such a hold on you, let alone a good one. Keep fighting for you, for your daughter, and for your marriage <3
Author's Response:
Thank you <3 I'm a good mother though. I can feel good about that. And it's not difficult really, I just never forget how lucky I am to have her, and how much I want her life to turn out better than mine did. She might know that I'm not perfect, but she will never have to wonder if I love her, or if she can rely on me.
Date: Oct 08, 2015 07:16 pm Title: Nothing is Ever Over
Is couple's therapy an option?
Author's Response:
I'm definitely considering it. I just have to hope he responds well to the suggestion. But, yes, definitely going to discuss that with him :)
Sorry about the pic, btw. I just totally forgot. I do that all the time. Now I'm having trouble uploading the resized version to photobucket. :( lolz
Date: Oct 08, 2015 10:55 am Title: Nothing is Ever Over
Whoaaah hang on what?!?!! First i fucking hate it when people say oh we dont want to get a divorce because we don't want to break up the home for our kids. If that relationship has gone to shit and no ones happy , then why stay togethet its not like youre making it easier or a more happy environment for the kids. They know your daughter probably can tell something is wrong. And seriously fuck that dick what the hell is he doing ignoring you, and looking at porn? Thats not your fault i don't care if he makes you feel like it is. Its not your job to get him to act like a human being and a better husband. You are NOT responsible for his behavior. He needs to put forth effort to make this relationship work if you both still want to otherwise what the hell is the point. Trust me your daughter would be better off seeing her parents one on one then togethet like this. My mom gave legit the same lame ass excuse for not divorcing the fucking asshole of a biological father i had, and when he dumped her it got so much better because i wasnt stuck in the same environment with both of them, with all that fighting and arguing. I know you don't think this because your family thats debatable, your asshole of a husband and whoever tried to tell you what your worth was, that you dont deserve to be happy and do whatever the hell you want and be whoever the hell you want and love and support you anyway but you fucking do. You deserve to be happy, you deserve to be loved and accepted. Best advice i can give you fuck them, go with you gut, and do not take shit from anyone. You do not owe him anything just because hes been patient with you. Ya its a hell of a lot fucking easier to numb your feelings and block everything out so you aren't such a burden to people you care about. Fact is that does not work in the long run. You only end up hurting you. About getting self confidence it takes work, first you gotta cut out the toxic people in your life. I found a few great articles on that, and then just go do whatever makes you happy. Seriously. I can tell Amber's life is a reflection of yours and i would literally say the same thing to her. Stop running back to the people who broke you even if they are blood related, just because they are doesn't make them family and you do not owe them shit. If you dont like who you are or more importantly when you're around someone then you probably shouldnt be around them. I LOVE dr house too! He has my kind of humor. Another thing this is so lame but whatever but i used to repeat this quote in my head, you gain courage, strength and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. Fear of offense definitely counts. Ok you notice how House doesnt give a fuck about what anyone thinks or if offends anyone he just goes with his gut to help his patients abd other people? Thats what i do actually, i just realized one day i have to take control of my life otherwise someone else will. My mom being a recovering alcoholic and her ex being a fucking asshole made me realize that. So its not too late to be happy ok? Do what you have to do to acheive that. Because you and I know this isnt working. And im guessing your daughter knows too.
Author's Response:
Hello Fire, nice to see you, and may I say that I have always liked your pennane? And I have always felt a lot of admiration for the way you live up to that handle :)
It's not the porn that really bothers me. I mean it's not like I can say that I don't think about anyone else, lmfao! The neglect, though - yeah that sucks. And yet, this is the best I've ever been treated by anyone. If I cut out all the toxic people, there will literally be no one left.
My daughter knows as much as most six year -old knows about their parents' problems. The only reason I don't consider my life a total failure is that I have always managed to give her a safe, happy, healthy environment no matter what else was going on. All she knows is that mommy is really, really sad sometimes.
People tend to dislike me. I haven't been successful in making connections with people. I can honestly say that I don't know what I could do differently. I might be too insane for relationships.
I don't know what's going to happen yet. The only thing I know is that I will always take good care of my kid and do what is right for her. The rest will fall into place.
Or it won't. Who knows, I guess.
I can't survive on my own yet, but I'm working on it. And once I get there, things will be different.
Thank you, as always for your amazing insight. It is much appreciated <3
Date: Sep 30, 2015 05:13 pm Title: No one like Mike - Seven Reasons Michael Rocks My World
HEy baby girl! Its great 2 hear from like always. I know how much u love Michelle and u can identify with her. How is ur writing process coming? Hope 2 Hear from u soon!
Author's Response:
Hey honey! Last chapter was rough, but I'm finally updating :)
Date: Sep 27, 2015 02:55 pm Title: No one like Mike - Seven Reasons Michael Rocks My World
I'm great honey, great 2 hear from u I know his eyes look medicated and I love that look on his face, it's sexy 2 me 2. more updates on my story soon if u can hold on until then lol hope 2 hear from u sooN!
Author's Response:
Hey honey :) I updated my story fairly recently. Looking forward to your update!
Date: Sep 24, 2015 05:52 pm Title: No one like Mike - Seven Reasons Michael Rocks My World
Hey love, Just read ur blog and I like it. I also read what u said about my story, I'm ao glad u like it a lot. Linaya was the name I just came up with and I think it is a beautiful and gorgeous name 2 at first her name was Julie but I changed it and yes she is the only 1 4 him (other than me) lol and she can b the sweetest person but If u try her, she's the 1 u don't wanna play with. Well, his wife is about 2 find out about how Michelle feels snout her husband in time. I like ur story about ur feelings about autumn. I love that pic of my husband mj, God he looks so fine an u have the right 1 where when I look at it I feel like he looking at me (I know it's a mental thing, don't judge me) I know u won't but Idc what other ppl think or say. How u been? I'm doing ok can't complain.hooe 2 hear from u soon.
Author's Response:
Doing okay :) I love that pic too. To me his eyes look kind of far away though. Like he's heavily medicated. But I'm a weirdo because I think that's cute and sexy. Lol. Also it goes well with the title. :) How's everything with you? <3