Date: Mar 22, 2019 08:36 pm Title: Chapter 18
Your story is amazing! I hope michael should waiy for tamina and not date lisa. Tamina would be so heartbroken.
Date: Feb 14, 2015 05:51 pm Title: Chapter 1
Hello! I went back through to see were you could improve and mainly it's grammar and punctuation. I think once you grasp the concept of conveying emotion and building the charcters, it'll help your story to flow more. And It's all there, I can see it. But once you structure the story and your writing style, it will be perfect. At this point no one is perfect. I'm still learning as I write. The more you write, the better you'll get. I would suggest that you read a few stories on the board and see how you should write your charcter's POV and conveying their emotion. Also there is a thread for tips on writing on this board that you will find some interest in. I really hope this helps. Feel free to contact me if you need anything.
Looking forward to to reading more from you.
Author's Response:
Thank you x
Date: Feb 13, 2015 03:21 pm Title: Chapter 18
Hi! I think you have a great story going here. I see that you have improved with your writing with each chapter. I hope I'm not coming off rude, but keep working on your writing style. The more you write, the better you'll get. I see that you said this was your first story and I applaud you for taking the chance and sharing your story. Do not get discouraged though because of the reviews...this story has potential. Please keep going with this. If you ever want any advice, please feel free to contact me.
Author's Response:
Hi thank you for your honest review i really appreciate it. I did have quite a hard time in the beginning as it was the first time i tried something like this. I would like to know what improvements you would like to see as it is important that my readers are enjoying the story.
Thank you x