Reviewer: wonderfulmistake Anonymous [Report This]
Date: Nov 17, 2014 10:38 pm Title: Chapter 15: Sing-A-Long Songs

Maaan, oh man, lots of stuff happened in this chapter.

Things are getting very interesting. Seems like Julia's developing some feeeeelings! Lol Although, she probably feels conflicted given how last time with Michael went, Janelle's sour attitude, Michael's fame, and Michael's problems that are slowly coming to light. I'm sure Janelle will grow to like Michael, but for right now, I think she's being rightfully suspicious and cautious. I'd be wondering what the eff is going on with my best friend, too. I think she'll grow to be more supportive of her friendship with Michael, but it'll definitely take time. I'm looking forward to the chapter where Janelle meets Michael, but I know that's a looong time coming, lol.

This chapter was so funny! Love the karaoke bits and the KFC and Bill and everything! Maan, that creepy dude. He sure was paying attention to "Mike's" singing or something, I don't know. Ahh, Julia got Michael to loosen up about the alcohol.

So, vitiligo, painkillers, and the release party for "We Are the World"... Seems like next chapter is going to be loaded.

Author's Response:

Ha! I haven't even started fleshing out Janelle and Michael's meeting, but a great idea just popped into my head ;) Thanks, LOL!

Thank you so much for such a sweet review!! The next chapter's been swimming around in my head since the day I thought of this story, so stay tuned!!

Reviewer: ladyT Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 17, 2014 09:55 pm Title: Chapter 15: Sing-A-Long Songs

I don't know if I really believe that Michael is okay about Harry, but good for him for playing it cool. It seems like Julia was expecting a reaction about it. Maybe she likes Mike more than she realizes or maybe she's scared to let her feelings for Mike get deep because of all these issues he has. She might like Harry, but he might be a convenient distraction from Mike. I just feel bad for these two. It seems like it's one thing after the other. I think the pills are going to make her pause even more about continuing a friendship with him, but she'll try to be understanding and encourage him to try to give them up.

Author's Response:

we'll see where the painkiller situation goes ;) I think Julia truly doesn't know what she's looking for from either Harry or Mike...typical!

Thank you for reviewing!!! Keep on reading!

Reviewer: 2DreamFire Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 17, 2014 08:46 pm Title: Chapter 15: Sing-A-Long Songs

Ahhh!! This was an AWESOME chapter! I was really looking forward to this one! Sorry I didn't review last chapter, but I just read it right now along with this one.

That story about Michael's llama eating Brooke Shields' dress is so hilarious! I actually really did laugh out loud. I just love all the stuff you included in this chapter. The KFC, the funny dialogue, the Karaoke... Julia would totally be a good addition to Michael's security team, ha. Fast reflexes! I really like Bill -- a really nice, chill dude that cares about Michael.

I have heard about the story of Michael getting beaten up in a gas station in Alabama! Wow, that always stuck with me too. So horrible. I believe Jermaine also told that story.

I'm glad Julia told Michael about Harry. You just know their feelings are going to progess into some more romantic territory, so by just telling Michael now, there's no secrets. Julia seems slightly disappointed by Michael's reaction ;) I think she wanted him to show more of an interest, but y'know, Michael played it cool... all like "you're my sister". Riiiight, Michael xD Keep telling yourself that.

So, also a bit of a milstone chapter in that you've really done some setting up for things to come. The vitiligo, the injuries, the painkillers... and a few other little details that I can see being more fleged out later on. I think you've got Michael's character and reactions down pretty well. How you're writing him is pretty much how I imagined him to have been.

Really looking forward to the next chapter! Seems like a lot of stuff will go down. This has been my favorite chapter as of yet, but all of your chapters are pretty darn awesome!! ^^

Author's Response:

Thank you!! You're so sweet! :) :) Especially for saying you like my version of Michael--he's definitely a challenge. Gotta walk the very fine line between quirky and gaurded, you know? The next chapter was actually the second scenario ever popped into my head with this story, so I'm excited to finally get it out there!

Thank your reviewing every time!! Keep on reading!

Reviewer: VickiJ Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 17, 2014 10:38 am Title: Chapter 14: Rocky

I have to agree with janelle about Julia's behavior in this chapter. I also thought it was weird that she never mentioned to Michael that she was seeing Harry. I understand why she didn't tell Harry about Michael but he does think they're in a relationship with Julia and she knows it no matter how much she denies it. I get the feeling that Harry will end up with his feelings hurt at the end of all this drama. Michael is too emotionally damaged and he'll just end up hurting Julia again not intentionally but in order to protect himself. I guess Julia will learn her lesson once she gets to LA.

 

Author's Response:

Weeeeee'llll seeeeee ;) I have a feeling it's not going to go how everyone's thinking!

thank you so much for the review!! keep reading!!!

Reviewer: ladyT Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 16, 2014 07:30 pm Title: Prologue

I want to believe that Janelle is just trying to look out for Julia, but there might be a tinge of jealousy there. She just met him, and she's so Team Harry. Hmmm....girl I guess. I want my friends to be with good guys too, but there is nothing wrong with playing the filed a little. I don't know if it's going to take Michael finding out about Harry, but eventually it's going to stop being platonic between Michael and Julia. I know the love triangle will be very juicy. I can't wait! I love the letters between them. I think that they are really cute and funny. Julia should definitely have a round trip ticket, and her own hotel room. I'm really excited about this story. I look forward to udates all the time.

Reviewer: Ille Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 15, 2014 11:48 am Title: Prologue

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Hi, I've just made an account, so that I can comment my most favorite stories of this site (which includes yours ^^)

As you probably can see...English isn't my first language, so errors are inevitable ^^
I'm a writer for myself...so I can absolutely understand how it feels to have such many viewers and just a few comments...

So, I'm gonna let you know what I think about the story so far :)

First off all, I red the whole story at once and couldn't stop until i reached the end ^^
That means - you have a very great ability to write in a very fluid, pleasant way :)
I also like the pace of the story, you describe everything with a detail that's not too boring, but also not to rushed.

The second thing, I really love the way you portray each character - the real ones as the fictional ones.
I think you wrote Michael in a very realistic way - off course we don't know how he really, really was like...but it seems very close to the imagination you connect with him, in my opinion ^^
Also his emotional outbreaks...its a behavior you can really see happening.
I mean - being on of the most famous person on earth - it's kind of understandable that he must get crazy sometimes under that kind of pressure ( even if the way he treated Julia was mean indeed) but still.

What I'm trying to say is, that you gave the whole thing enough background and explanation for the reason of his the pain, rage and fears. I think that is one of the most important things – only that way the characters seem alive and like a real person: by giving them enough depth and time for us to get to know them.

That brings me right to my next point, your OC Julia.
I am really, really soo glad you didn't turn her into an exaggerated, unbelievable and completely perfect (not forgetting absolutely sexy) Bitch, like 70% of MJ fiction writers unfortunately do. Really.
That's something, that destroys each story (no matter how well written) right at the beginning...
But you gave Julia a personality. A real one. That doesn't mean she must be ugly or something like that - no. I only think that many writers are over descriptive about all the above – average talents and looks that their brilliant OCs have.
Julia, on the other hand, seems very natural. I just imagine her being pretty and normal and like somebody you can identify yourself with.

And like you said by yourself in the first chapter: there is no need to always force your OC in an empty, hopeless life or even better – an over dramatic past without any friends AND no parents … you know what I mean ^^

Then there is the relationship you gave Michael and Julia. I really like their friendship. I understand the reason why Michael sees, or wants to see her just as a friend. Being that lonely it's comprehensible that he doesn't want destroy their special bond by making the mistake of falling and changing everything with that.

And that is something...you really don't find very often in this kind of stories:

It's quite refreshing to read a fic where he and the OC girl don't jump on each other or have sex right in the middle of the first chapter.
You really gave them the time that is needed to keep a story realistic and interesting in the same way. I'm very curious where the things go and if and when Michael and Julia become more than just friends.
(I saw in the description the category romance – so I assume we come to that soon or later^^)

I think all of that are the reasons I like your story so much. Because it seems realistic. And funny. And enthralling and sad...– just all the emotions a good story should contain ^^

I'm looking forward to the next chapter and I hope I didn't scare you with this enormous review... :)

Author's Response:

WOW!! Thank you thank thank you for such a wonderful review!! Where are you from/what's your native language?

Thank you so much for picking up on all of the nuances that I've been trying to bring to this story. I actually don't read that much MJ fanfiction because I get so fed up with everything you're talking about...this story actually came about because it's the story I've been wanting to read. I've never written anything before, so it's been a challenge, but a lot of fun :)

Michael and Julia will of course end up having something...but I don't think it's going to be as conventiona or sappy as people are used to, lol!

You've given me the push to keep on writing to finish up the next chapter (it's a fairly long one...) so hopefully it should be up tonight or tomorrow afternoon!

Thank you so much again!

PLEASE keep reading and reviewing! It means so so much!!

Reviewer: Ngbballgyrl15 Signed [Report This]
Date: Nov 14, 2014 04:55 am Title: Chapter 13: Letters

Mannnn if I was Julia I'd be right in LA letting Mike make up for what he's done. The only thing is I'd make sure he booked me a round trip ticket this time, no private jet,  just in case he wanna act crazy again lol I mean who can say no to the opportunity of seeing the some of the greats like Ray Charles and Stevie Wonder....not me lol

Author's Response:

I think that's her rational as well ;)

Thanks for reading/reviewing!!! Keep on reading!