Chapter Five
Excitement was in the air that night as we were getting ready for the show, not only would we be showing off the line that I had worked hard to design and perfect but also my new boyfriend would be in the audience. This was exciting stuff. I couldn't help but feel a little nervous though as I peeked through the curtain on to the audience. There were marketers, other fashion designers and a few others sitting waiting for the show to start. Michael wasn't there yet though as he had told me he would wait until just before show time to just slip quietly in so he wouldn't take the spotlight off of me.

"Are you ready?" my father and other designer Pierre asked as he came up behind me putting his hands on my shoulders. Pierre had been with me from the beginning and was just as excited about this fashion show and the possibilities it presented as I was.

"Yes." I sighed, "But I'm nervous. There's going to be someone in the audience I want to impress."

He looked at me curiously because I hadn't mentioned to my family that I was seeing someone as my relationship with Michael was still quite new, "Oh? A designer you haven't told me about?"

I smiled shyly, "No. The man I'm seeing."

Pierre looked relieved that I finally found someone as he, like Zarah, had been trying for a very long time to set me up with some one, "Well Darling, I'm sure you'll impress him." and he walked away to check the models as the show was about to start.

I was about to walk away too, but just as I was about to, I just happened to peek through the curtain to see Michael quietly and without any security, come in and sit at the back of room. I smiled deeply and breathed a sigh of relief before I walked back to finish checking my models and to change into my outfit as well that I designed especially for Michael.

The show definitely went off without a hitch, my models definitely rocked Pierre and my designs and I loved seeing the different colours that went out onto the runway. It was definitely a sight to behold. Then when it came to my turn to hit the floor, Pierre straightened the collar of the jacket that I was wearing and asked me if I was sure I wanted to do this, "You haven't modeled in a long time Darling."

"Pierre. It's like riding a bike. A good model never forgets. And besides, it's a little late to change my mind now." I said as I did up the buttons on my coat.

"Well then, strut your stuff Darling." he said as he kissed my forehead.

"Thank you daddy." and I breathed in and exited through the curtain where the press went wild with what I was wearing. It was something I had never done before; A gold sequence jacket with black sequence pants to match and just for fun high heals that were also gold sequence. I could see by the expression on Michael's face that he was both impressed and surprised to see me modelling because I had told him that modelling was something I had given up. He was also stunned by the song I had chosen to walk out to The Way You Make Me Feel. This was a tribute to him in every way; my outfit, my modelling and the song because since he had come into my life I felt like a goddess and I finally wanted him to know this. Once I got to the end of the catwalk I stood looking at him with my hand out to him and my other on my hip mimicking poses I had seen from his music videos. Then the lights went down and before I knew it, Pierre was beside me with a microphone, "Darling Roberts Everyone!" The whole audience, including Michael, stood up and applauded loudly. Pierre kissed my cheek and I made my way back stage.

After Pierre had dismissed me from the stage, I went behind the curtain to change out of my outfit but not before my models and design crew were giving me their congratulations, especially my senior model Madoline who had helped me refresh my modelling skills, "You did wonderful Darling." she said as she gave me a light hug.

"Thank you Madoline. But if you will excuse me, there's someone I have to go find." and I made my way out to the front to find Michael.

He was still sitting at the back of the room, and as soon as he saw me, he stood up just in time to catch me in his arms, "You did amazing Nicole."

I smiled, "You liked my final performance?" I asked hesitantly.

He nodded, "But I thought you didn't do Gold and Sequence?"

"I don't. But a certain peacock that I know does." I teased.

"Well that peacock feels very loved." He beamed at me.

"Well he should. Because that's how I feel Michael." I was almost relieved because now he finally knew how I felt about him after being in love with him since the first time I went to Neverland.

His eyes widened and shawn brightly at me. But before he could say anything, Pierre came over and joined us, "You were beautiful Darling!" he said as he took me into a hug.

"Thank you daddy." then I looked at Michael who was looking shyly at my dad,

"Dad, there's someone I'd like you to meet." and I turned to Michael, "Michael, this is my father Pierre Roberts. Dad, this is Michael Jackson. The man I'm seeing."

I think Michael was half expecting my dad to know who he was already but my dad is a lot like me in the sense that he's not going to say he knows someone based on what they do for a living. He seemed relieved though when Pierre stuck out his hand to Michael and said, "nice to meet you Mr. Jackson. I trust you enjoyed the show."

Michael swallowed, "Yes. You and your daughter are quite talented."
Now it was my father's turn to be shy..what is it with me and shy men?, "Oh thank you. But everything you saw tonight was Darling's doing. Not mine. I was just here for moral support."

I elbowed him playfully, "Dad, don't be so modest. You did more than just moral support."

"Thank you sweet heart. I appreciate that. But if you both will excuse me, I have to run and meet Gloria. Have a good night you two."

Once he was gone, I looked back at Michael, "Well, you've met my dad." I shrugged nervously. Now I feel nervous? I didn't feel nervous at all through the entire show and now I feel nervous with this man that probably knows me better than anyone. Why?

"Yes. And he seems cool. It was different to be treated like a real person instead of The King of Pop."

"Yeah. My father is a lot like me. He never judges a person based on what they do for a living. And your music is what you do for a living." I smiled at him.
I could tell though that there was something on his mind, so I asked him if he wanted to get out of here. He nodded and we left. But instead of heading back to Neverland, we went back to my apartment as it was late, and I didn't really feel like sitting through the two hour car ride when I knew I was going to fall asleep anyway.

Michael was more than agreeable to this, "I'll get to see you in your natural habitat. Instead of the confines of the ranch."

"It wasn't confining." was all I was able to say before I unlocked the door to my modest little apartment. I then took off my coat and hung it on the hook by the door, "Make yourself at home. I'll be right back." I said as I walked to my bedroom to change into some sweat pants and a loose tshirt and to get the gift I had made for him; A suit jacket that was similar to the one I had worn earlier that night. When i came out, I found him looking at the various pictures I had on the wall by the door, "Michael, I have a surprise for you." I said as I held the coat behind my back.

He turned around, "A surprise? For me?"

I presented him with the jacket and he was like a kid at Christmas, "Wow. This is just like the one you wore today. This is for me?"

I nodded, "Unless you know of another peacock that I could give it too." I said as I helped him put it on. I was very impressed because it fit him perfectly and looked just as good on him as I had hoped. But when he turned back around to look at me, I noticed there were tears in his eyes, "Michael? Is there something wrong?"

"I want to ask you something. And I want your honest answer." he said quietly.

Now I was starting to get worried he was not usually this timid with me, "Michael, I've been honest with you since the beginning. Now what's wrong?"

He raised his head and looked at me with tears in his eyes, "What was your inspiration for your performance tonight?"

I wiped the tear away from his smooth cheek as it fell with my thumb, "You were. Michael, I've been wanting to tell you for awhile but you were always telling me you wanted to get to know me better."

"Tell me then." he said as his hands went to my hips and his breathing shallowed, "What have you wanted to tell me?"

"I love you Michael. I think I have since I first saw you at Neverland." and before I knew it his mouth was covering mine in a hard kiss revealing to me all the feelings he had been holding back since he met me; fire, passion and just raw love.

"I love you too Nicole. I knew it when you accepted Paris into a hug today at breakfast. I want you, no, need you in my life."

My heart swelled at the sound of those words being uttered from his lips. At this moment, I couldn't imagine being anywhere else but with this beautiful misunderstood man. So I caressed the side of his face, "I'm here and I'll be here as long as you need me."

He kissed me once more before he took me into his arms, "Oh Nicole. I love you."

I smiled deeply into his neck, "I love you too."

I awoke the next morning with Michael's arms still around me and my head on his chest and smiled at how peacefully he was sleeping. Since I knew he usually had difficulty sleeping I didn't want to wake him since he was sleeping so soundly. So I gently eased myself out of his arms, put his white shirt on and made my way to the washroom. Where I couldn't help but smile at the state that I was in, my hair was messy but sexy and I was wearing nothing but his white button down shirt. I also found myself remembering everything that we did last night; how I kissed every one of his vitiligo scars and scars from various accidents he had had while performing and how he kissed my cesarian scar from Kyle. I went still as I remembered what he said to me last night while he was holding me in his arms, that he would love it if we could have children together and how he wanted to marry me eventually. Being his girlfriend and friend to his children was one thing, but could I be married to the pop star and be the mother of his child? Those were things he and I definitely needed to talk about but until then I decided I would go back to bed and be with my sleeping man.

He slept for another two hours before I finally saw his big brown eyes shining at me, "Good morning." he said sweetly.

"Hi. You were really tired weren't you? It's almost noon." I said as I propped myself up on his chest but then teased, "Or did I just wear you out?"

He winked at me, "What do you think? Or maybe I'm just comfortable here with you." as he ran his hand up my back. I guess I wasn't very good at hiding my concern towards his revelations last night because he soon noticed the worried look in my eye which proved that I had something on my mind and he knew exactly what it was, "You're over thinking what I said last night, aren't you?"

I blushed, "Is it that obvious."

"Yes." he said solemnly, "Let's talk about it Nicole." he said as he sat up pulling me into his lap.

"Well, you'll have to forgive me. I've been married twice already and both ended badly."

"That's something we have in common I guess." he joked referring to his marriages to Lisa Marie and Debbie.

I elbowed him playfully in the ribs, "Then you understand my trepidation then. I don't want to lose you how I lost Darian and I don't want to relive what happened with Steven."

Michael sweetly kissed the top of my head and wrapped his arms around me, "You were what, eighteen when you married Steven? And from what you've said, he was an ignorant arrogant man who didn't appreciate you. I can promise you I won't treat you like that. And as for how you lost Darian, I can't promise that because only God knows when my time will be."

I nodded because I knew that was true but there was still the matter of wanting children with me eventually, "Were you serious when you said you wanted children with me?"

"Yes. I've seen you with Paris and Prince. You would make an amazing mother"

Then came a question I had been dreading to ask, but again the practical side of me was showing, if we didn't work out would he take the baby away from me? I couldn't bare to lose another child even if it was to his father, "Michael, if we didn't work out, would you take the baby away from me? Like Paris and Prince?" I hated myself for asking but I had to know.

He sighed and held me tighter, "You have to understand, what happened with my children was a different circumstance, Debbie willingly let go of them. I wouldn't do anything like that unless I had your consent."

I let out a sigh of relief because I don't think I could ever consent to giving up my child after losing my first son. That would just be too hard. And I knew Michael was good to his word because in all the time we had been together, both as friends and otherwise I hadn't seen anything to lead me to believe that he wasn't telling me the truth. Even though that was the case and even though I loved him, I wasn't ready to become his wife, "Can we wait though?"
I felt the muscles in his arms and abdomen tense around me, "You want to wait?"

I bit my bottom lip before I replied, "Yes Michael. Only because I want us to be grounded in our relationship before we even think of getting married or having a baby. Because I don't know about you, but I would like this marriage to be the one that sticks."

He wrapped his arms around me tighter and told me that he felt the same, "My last two divorces were hard. I don't want to go through that again." he then asked me something that I couldn't say no to even if I wanted to, "Can I at least ask you to move in with me?"

How could I say no to that? I had only been at Neverland for a month and I already thought of the ranch as home but I still wanted to keep my apartment for late nights at the office, "Of course I'll live with you at Neverland. Besides, I can't let Mrs. Ross have all the fun bossing you around those big grounds."

His soft eyes turned hard and devious, "Oh really?"

"Yes really." I answered cooly not prepared for his next move.

In one smooth move he had me pinned down on the bed and began tickling my sides, "Boss me around too much I'll just have to do this."

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"Wait, Grand dad was married twice before he met you?"

I nodded, "Oh yes. Neither lasted very long. He told me neither one of them could handle being married to the rockstar Michael Jackson."

"Did you meet either of his wives?"

I told her that I had never met Prince and Paris' mother but I did meet his first wife Lisa Marie when she came to visit him.

"She visited him? He stayed friends with his ex wife?"

Much to my dismay he did, "Yes. But not so much after I met her."

"What happened?" she asked curiously.

"It was after the fashion show and I moved back to Neverland with him. She came to visit him a few weeks later."

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When I came down to breakfast the next morning I could hear talking come from the kitchen; it was Michael and another woman. Thinking he was just talking to Mrs.Ross, I walked into the kitchen to find that it was not Mrs. Ross but rather his ex wife Lisa Marie. I froze when i saw her and even though Michael had told me that Neverland was home and I was free to come and go as I pleased, I felt like was intruding. Especially when he looked surprise to see me standing there, "Nicole, you're up."

Lisa Marie also turned around to look at me. Her grey eyes were threatening as she surveyed me stanidng in the kitchen still wearing my blue pajamas, "I take it she's the one you were telling me about?" she said to him while not taking her eyes off me.

I blushed at the thought of him telling her about me when I heard nothing about her except for what was written in the news when they were married. He smiled, "Yes Lisa. I'd like you to meet Nicole Roberts. Nicole, this is my ex wife Lisa Marie."

I nodded awkwardly at her, "It's nice to meet you."

Her harsh grey eyes surveyed me again, "Hmmm."

Now I really felt uncomfortable so I decided to grab my breakfast, a yogurt and banana, and eat in my room, "I think I'll just grab something and go."

"Are you sure? You should join us."

I didn't think we all felt that way so I declined, "No Michael. I've got some stuff to do anyway." I quickly grabbed my food from the stainless steal refrigerator and with the same speed exited through the same door I came through.

I paused outside the door to catch my breath but at the same time I couldn't help catch their conversation, "Well, she seems different."

"Hey, now don't start." he said gruffly, "she's with me now."

"Michael if I have told you once, I have told you a thousand times - you have to be careful who you bring to Neverland. You met her at a concert."

"Lisa, she's not just another groupie. She's special."

I smiled when I heard that.

"Yeah. Special. You won't be thinking that when she takes advantage of your wealth and fame."

I gasped when I heard that. I was a millionaire myself. Why would I need his money? And as for his fame, I couldn't be bothered to take advantage of it. Michael knew this, "No. She wouldn't do that."

Hell no I wouldn't do that! I couldn't bare to listen to this woman bash me anymore so I dashed up to my room where I stayed all day until Michael came looking for me, "Nicole." he said with a knock.

"Come in Michael." I said from my perch on the window seat.

Even though I was still in my pajamas and had been crying, I didn't care if he saw me like that or not, "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked when he saw my tear stained face and sat down with me on the blue padded window seat.

"I heard you and Lisa Marie talking."

His look saddened and he was ashamed, "She's just worried about me."

"By accusing me of wanting your money and fame? You know that's the last thing on my mind."

"I know. And I told her that. But in her and my world it's not uncommon to have fortune seekers."

Her and my world? I knew he was just referring to the music industry but his words stung all the same because I didn't know what that world was like. It was something I could never share witht him like she did. Yes, I was a fashion designer but under a different name and I wasn't constantly in the public eye like he and Lisa Marie, "And she was just warning you against me for the sake of your interests."

"Exactly. I told her that you would never do something like that."

"How do you know though? We've only known each other for a month and a half." I asked him mostly for reassurance but I was also curious about his reasoning. I was not prepared for his answer though; I don't know if it was my humility or modestly, I have no idea, but his reasoning really surprised me.

"Because I've seen you with my children. You are so loving and nurturing with them. But what made me take interest in you at all was what you said to your sister when you were back stage."

I blushed remembering what I said bout him but I also thought he was in his dressing room unable to hear that comment, "I told her you might be just another pathetic clown."

"Right. You treat me like a normal guy. If you were just another groupie, you wouldn't do that."

It was true, I had learned all about what it was like to be a regular groupie from when I was married to my first husband. Even though he never made it big, the fame he did have caused him to have groupies and regretably, I was one of them. After that mess, I resolved never to act like that with anyone, famous or not, "Your fame does not make you Michael. Who you are like this does."

He took my hand and smiled, "Thank you. Just don't let what Lisa said bother you."

Even though words like hers were inevitable, I told him I would try not to let being called a gold digger bother me, "And I want you to promise me that you won't stop acting like this."

"Around you, I don't know another way to act."

I felt myself blush deep red at that. Boy, what was it about this man that made me turn red at a single word, "You really have to stop doing that."

"What?" he smiled curiously.

"Saying things that make me blush or else I might shine brighter than your carousel and they'll really wonder what goes on at Neverland."

His sweet and innocent look changed to one that was devious, "Oh really? Maybe I like to make you blush." and the next thing I knew, he had grabbed me, lifted me down on to the carpet and me pinned down on the brown carpeted floor and he was tickling me. This was not fair on his part because I was extremely ticklish and I could do nothing but laugh.

"That's a sound I love to hear. Much better than you crying." he said as he layed down beside me on the floor.

I wiped the tears of laughter that had formed away from my eyes, "Well if I continue to stay here you will hear it a lot."

He propped himself up on his hand before he moved a strand of hair away from my face and told me he liked the sound of that. Then he remembered Prince and Paris were wanting to go on the Ferris Wheel, "Do you want to come outside with us?"

I wasn't crazy about going on the Ferris wheel because of my fear of hights but I did love watching how he was with his children when they were together on the rides. So I agreed to come with them, "Sure. Just give me a few minutes to get dressed. I'll be right down."

He smiled, "Alright." Then he kissed my forehead and got up off the floor before he extended his hand to me so I could do the same.

"I'll see you in a bit." He kissed my lips softly and then left the room so I could get changed.

Once he was gone, I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror and saw the glow that was coming from my smile and it made me smile even more because I had not been this happy in a very long time and did not think I could be.

Unfortunately, my happiness was to be put on hold temporarily because once I got down to the Ferris wheel, who did I see sitting on the wooden bench facing it but Lisa Marie. I swallowed hard and fought back the urge to yell at her and I just walked over the wheel to watch Michael and the kids having a great time on the rides. Apparently Lisa Marie knew I was pretending not to notice that she was sitting there because the next thing I knew she was standing beside me, "He's good with his children isn't he?"

Michael waved at me from the top of the ride and I waved back, "Yes he is. He puts as much care into them as he does into anything he does." I said as I watched Michael laughing and smiling with Prince and Paris at the top of the Ferris wheel.

"Yes he does." She then turned to me, "I would also hate to see someone take advantage of his generousity and loving nature. He's been hurt before."

I wanted to laugh because from what he had told me, she was one of the major causes of pain in his life but instead, "I don't want to see that either. He deserves to be as happy as he makes the world."

"Then we have an understanding then. I know his wealth and fame can be tempting to a nobody like you. But take my advice, it's not worth it."

Once again I had to fight the urge to hit this woman as I groaned but before I could tell her off, I noticed what she was wearing; A royal blue empire waisted low cut shirt and a pair of black tight skinny jeans with ankle high black felt boots. I couldn't help but laugh because I had designed that entire outfit, "You're calling the woman who designed your high priced clothing a nobody?"

She looked down at her clothes, "What?"

"That's right. I'm Darling Roberts the millionairess who's company is stationed in down town L.A.. Yes, I may have met him at a concert and yes I may live in a little apartment but I am not with Michael because of what his money and fame could bring me. I am madly in love with that man and I wouldn't dream of hurting him for all the money in the world."

She blanched at my response.

"So yes you don't need to worry about me taking advantage of him because I would love him even if he was dirt poor."

Lisa Marie was so angry that she stormed off away from me back towards the house. This caused Michael to take notice and come over to me once he and the kids were off the ferris wheel, "Where's Lisa?"

I rolled my eyes, "She left. "

"Did something happen?" he asked me as he sat down on the bench beside me.

I nodded, "Yes something happened. She called me a no body. So I told her who this no body was."

Michael looked dissappointed, "Wow. That must have really upset her."

Upset her? If I wasn't angry before, I certainly was now. He claimed that I was his girlfriend and he claimed to love me and he was worried about her, "Who are you defending here? Because it sounds to me that she's higher on the priority list than the woman you claim to love."

Michael didn't say anything, he just continued to look down at the ground ashamedly but when he did speak he proceeded to tell me something that angered me even more, "You don't understand."

I exploded, "Don't you dare tell me that I don't understand. You're the one who doesn't get it."

He looked saddened by my outburst and a part of me wanted to take him in my arms and tell him that I didn't mean it. But I knew that if I did that I would lose my momentum. So I got up from the bench and walked swiftly back to the house and went straight to my room to start packing my things. As much as I loved him, I was not about to stay with him if I was going to be his second choice. I had more dignity than that.