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Author's Chapter Notes:

Hey beautiful people, I wrote this one-shot short story awhile ago and decided to upload it on a whim. This is based off of the song My Kind of Love by Emeli Sade. Hope you like it!

The California sun follows me as I walk in through the automatic double glass doors of the tall luminous building and inhale that smell of the hospital that I've become all too familiar with over the past few months. It greets me as a sweet bitter taste enters my being. Sweet because she's survived another day... one I get to spend with her; bitter because it may be our last together. 

My dark black Calfskin loafer shoes makes a soft thud onto the gray speckled white tiled floors with each step I take down the long winding hallway I've traveled down countless times. Honestly, I don't see how she does it. The drab color of the hospital walls never fails to throw a bucket of ice cold water over my spirits like a woman who comes to bed with long toenails, or God forbid!-a belly ring that hooks on to crucial bits and pieces of a man's anatomy during intimacy. That familiar smell that all hospitals seem to elicit... is it medication? Bleach? Too much disinfectant? It looms in the air with an annoying palpable presence, never leaving my nostrils. I'm starting to think if I'm stuck in this building too long, not only will I lose my sense of smell, I'll lose my sense of humor as well. 

But I'd put up with anything for her... 

A young nurse's smile is returned along with an obligatory head nod as I continue my journey up to the oncology ward. That same smile I had gradually disappears as my eyes descend and my head sorrowfully hangs low under the black fedora hat perched on top of my mass of jet black curls. 

I stuff my large hands into my black slacks as my bodyguards and I step onto the elevator. Legs shoulder width a part, I close my eyes, tilt my head back and take a deep breath as I mentally prepare myself for the visit ahead. That familiar cacophonic DING sounds throughout the enclosed space making me reopen my eyes. The double doors promptly part, revealing the oncology ward of the hospital, and a blast of cool air from the air conditioner smooth's itself across my face. 

As soon as I step out, I see Dr. Shepard's genuine smile ease itself onto his middle-aged face with my presence. "Mr. Jackson. Perfect timing! Just left her room." 

I furrow my eyebrows and shake his hand. "How is she Doc?"

His thin lips spread into an apologetic smile as he regards me for a second. "It's time..."

The door to her room is parted. I look through the crack but can only see her hands. Her right index finger is enclosed by a finger blood pressure monitor as a nurse in hot pink scrubs stands over her bed. 

"Mr. Jackson, I am just so sorry... but she's put up a hell of a fight. We're going to try and make everything as comfortable for her as we can-"

"Thank you."

He emphatically regards me for a couple of minutes-wondering if there's something else he should say or do, no doubt-before giving me a friendly pat on the back. 

The nurse that was taking her blood pressure walks out of the room, pauses when she sees me, and gives me a sad smile before continuing out. 

Pushing the door back, I walk into the room and am greeted with lively dialogue and music emanating from the TV set I had installed in her room when she first arrived. Glancing at the TV, I see the cartoonTom and Jerry displayed vividly. 

I'm not surprised. She's as much of a big kid as me. 

Grinning, I look back towards her to find her lying there peacefully with her eyes closed and a hand resting over her stomach. She lies there in a hot pink scarf wrapped around her now bald head, a long sleeved sweater, and a pair of leggings. My grin quickly fades once I realize her chest isn't moving up and down. 

My heart immediately drops. 

She immediately scrunches her face into a funny face and sticks out her tongue at me. My heart quickly ascends as I burst out in laughter and land with a thud onto her bed.

"Hi, baby," She wraps her long arms around my neck and pulls me into a long kiss. I ignore her slightly cold lips, and kiss her back, longingly, as if hoping to warm them. 

"I hate that joke by the way," My thumb and forefinger pinches her side causing her to squirm. 

Her lips curl up and hook onto my heart. "But it's soo fun."

"For you."

She leans in and playfully bites my cheek. Placing her palms flat down on the bed, she struggles to sit up. Hooking my hands under her arms, I pull her up and lean her against the bedpost. As I lean in, I hear her suck in a large breath of air. I'm wearing her favorite cologne... Bal a Versailles. 

She raises her eyebrows. "How do I look?"

Ignoring the dark circles that have seem to become imprinted under her eyes, the weight loss, and wheezing, I kiss her forehead. "Absolutely beautiful." For all I see is her smooth skin, piercing eyes, and perfect lips that once made other women envious. 

Turning her head to the side, her eyes goes to the framed picture of us two that sits on her bedside. A picture taken when I was blissfully unaware of the terminal illness that gripped her reality. A picture taken where we both stood outside under the Santa Barbara sun at Never land, the merry go round in the background, my arms around her shoulders. 

"Why do you love me so much, Michael?" She asks. 

I'm unmoved by her question. She asks it often. "Because I couldn't buy your love," I say simply.

She closes her eyes and smiles.

"I can't grant you any wishes. Won't promise you the stars. But don't ever question if my heart beats for you... and only you," I grip her cold hands and try to warm them. 

"I really don't want to die here..." She says breathlessly. 

"I bought something for you."

She peeks an eye open. "For moi?"

Grinning, I lean over and pick up the large duffel bag I brought in with me. After unzipping it, I pull out wigs upon wigs. Long, short, curly, straight, wavy, you name it I had it. 

Her delightful laughter feels my ears as she catches each one I throw at her. "You got all these?" She's incredulous.

"Rebbie, Janet, and LaToya."

She looks at me with wide eyes. "Your sisters? But they hate me."

"That's not true," I truthfully tell. 

She gives me a look. "Oh yea, that's right. After the cancer thing, everyone loves me."

Knowing she's now telling the truth, I smile and shrug my shoulders. "Which one you gonna wear?"

She slowly holds up a hot pink wig with straight hair and long bangs. "I pink I can. I pink I can."

"Perfect," I stand. "We're getting you out of here."

"Seriously?"

I don't answer. Just dig around in the large duffel bag before pulling out a leopard print waist coat. 

"You said you don't want to die here. And you don't have to."

"So we're gonna go? Just like that? How?"

I scoff at her. "Haven't you heard? I'm Michael Jackson, girl."

I mentally take a picture of the look of love in her eyes as she grins up at me.

"Ok... I don't want them there though." She looks over my shoulder, through the cracked door, to the large burly men dressed in black-my bodyguards.

"Ok," I agree. "Now quit holding us up, and help me get this jacket on you."

Giggling the whole while, she pulls on the jacket and flats I got her, before pulling on the wig. Holding out her arms to the side, she makes a funny face.

"You look like a beauty queen."

"Eh, you'll tell a dying girl anything," She says as I lift and place her in a wheelchair. 

"Shut up," I murmur.

As I wheel her out of the room and into the hallway, she tilts her head back to look up at me. "I feel like we're breaking out of prison!" She squeals excitedly. I hadn't seen her so excited about something in a while. It reassured me that I was doing the right thing. 

I tickle her at that sensitive spot underneath her chin eliciting another cascade of giggles... music to my ears. 

She sits Indian style in the wheelchair as I push her down the long winding hallway. The drab gray colors and the horrid scent don't matter so much anymore now that I have my Baby with me.

"Let's speed it up!" She calls. 

Grinning and biting my bottom lip, I quicken my paste and speed down the hallway. Ignoring the fact that we must look like two badass kids, she throws her fists into the air and gives a thumbs up sign as I push her into the sunlight. 

"Ah, yes," She closes her eyes and smiles. "This is... the bestest." 

Ten minutes later, we're on the 101, driving towards Never land with me in the driver's seat, her spread out in the back seat. When I glance at her in the rear view mirror, I see her thoughtfully staring out the window. 

"Whatcha thinking about?"

"There's no LA traffic," She does a goofy one-sided grin. "That's one thing I will not miss."

"It's fate." 

I throw her favorite bag of chips-Dorito's-at her, which she happily accepts. 

Then suddenly, "OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!! TURN IT UP!! THIS MY SONG!"

"This is so random," I say with a roll of the eyes.

"Turn it up!" She whines.

Shaking my head, I do as she says.

"I always feel like somebody's watching me!!" She screeches from the back seat. "I always feel like somebody's watching me!!" 

I throw a chip back at her. 

She swats it away and continues singing. "Who's playin' tricks on me?? Dooh de dah doh de dahhh ah uh ahhh," She hums along with the melody. "I wonder who's watchin' me now! The IRS??! I always feel like somebody's watchin' me!!" Her mouth parts as wild laughter follows. "Hey, I can relate to this song. I always do feel like somebody's watching me in that damn place," She's referring to the hospital. 

I hear her ball up the now empty bag of chips and place it somewhere.

"Finished already with those chips? You're eating very well today."

"Well, it's only natural now that I'm eating for two..."

My eyes shoot to hers in the mirror.

"Me and my fast growing tumor."

We both bust out laughing causing me to swerve and get honked at.

"Careful baby or I'll be dying from a car crash instead of cancer!"

"Alright enough with the cancer jokes," I try to fight off my laughter in vain.

"Just one more! I was talking to Laurie, she's this other cancer patient, and we came up with the benefits to having cancer. Ready? Ok."

I listen to her as she numbers off.

"1. Chemo is great for weight loss. I've never weighed less in my life, except maybe when I first emerged into this world. Pretty soon all those pro-annas will be idolizing me.
2. Hair is much easier now. I just throw on a scarf, or better yet, PUT MY HAIR ON. And at the end of the day? TAKE MY HAIR OFF. Wigs are so easy.
3. Great pain meds. The doctors hate to see you in pain. So they take care of you, if you know what I mean 
4. Have you used your Cancer Card? I mean seriously, if you haven't, do it! Not all the time, just when you really need/want to. Want to get a celebrity's autograph? Let it slip that you're battling cancer, and BAM! you got it.
5. Free stuff. People give you so much stuff when they find out. Who doesn't love presents? 
6. Scholarships. Oh dear lord. Look at all the money people donate to help students with cancer pay for college! Cancer funds are loaded. Tap into that.
7. Getting away with saying very inappropriate things. I can make really insensitive jokes. And if someone gives me beef, I just look at them and say, 'I have cancer. What's your excuse?'"

By the end, I'm cracking up. "I'm going to hell for laughing at this."

"See you there," She winks with a yawn. 

"Take a nap... we'll be there soon, honey."

She does as I say and lays down in the backseat and closes her eyes. There are moments where I catch her with her eyes open, pensively looking up at the roof of the car, before blinking slowly a couple of times and going back to sleep.

"Mmm... I know that smell," I hear her say an hour later. She slowly pulls herself up, lets down the window, and sticks her head out so she can get a better look at the dark pond near the mansion at Never land. She closes her eyes and takes a deep breath as if it would be her last. 

"What do you want to do first, Melrose?"

"I want to swing."

We enjoy another day at Never land on the swing sets, the merry go-round, we munch on cotton candy and other sweets, before watching the sun set on the horizon on the highest hill on my property. All the while, her smiles and giggles warm my heart. 

As the sun makes it descend, she leans her head on my shoulder. 

I hear her take a deep intake of breath. A warning that she's about to say something. "Are you mad at me?" She croaks up at me. 

I frown. "No. Why do you think that?"

"Because I'll be leaving soon... won't be able to make good on any of the things we said we'd do. Can't have your babies... can't grow old together..."

I suck in a deep breath of air as I look off into the distance and regret any bad periods we'd had between us. I wasn't always this guy... this supportive man to the love of his life in her last days... this man who'd do anything just to see her smile. There was a time when I kept my heart protected from her, far away from my sleeve. 

When she broke the news to me she had cancer, it broke something inside of me. I was very angry with her. Hated her in that moment. Hated her for keeping something so enormous from me. She knew for years on end her ultimate fate, and spat at my knowledge of it. Knew what was going to happen when we met, when we fell in love, encouraged my ignorance of her terminal illness. Until that one inevitable day, she finally told me. That day held a myriad of emotions for me, but the most predominant one was hurt. Hurt that the woman I'd finally found was going to be taken away from me. Hurt that she concealed it from me. 

But I couldn't let her leave this world without knowing how much I loved her. Without her seeing me fight for her even when she couldn't fight for herself. Without seeing her smile. Without her feeling my kind of love. 

We reach for each other's hands. She squeezes my hand with as much energy as she can muster.

"I know sometimes I get angry, and I say what I don't mean," I raise an eyebrow and look down at her head on my shoulder. "When you've given up. When no matter what you do it's never good enough. When you never thought that it could ever get this tough... like now, that's when you feel my kind of love."

 

The End

Chapter End Notes:

Thank you for reading!

Music video for My Kind of Love by Emeli Sande: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=esYMnZqYk-U

 

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