It's 1985. I've been dating Michael for about a month. I'm seventeen and he's twenty seven. He says age is just a number and if you love someone it doesn't matter the age, race, religion, or gender. My name is Autumn Jackson (coincidence?). I grew up in Sunrise Manor, Nevada and I moved in with Michael a month ago. I was never really close to my parents even though I was an only child. My father is a smart, strict businessman who is in the car dealership business while my mother is a volunteer nurse at the local hospital. I only see my parents about twice a month.

     I met Michael for the first time when I was thirteen at a concert he was doing for a charity event outside of Las Vegas. I've been a fan of him for as long as I can remember so when I heard he was coming close, I jumped at the chance. I got the opportunity to meet him afterwards, and when I shook hands with him, I instantly knew I was in love. It wasn't until about two months ago when I saw him perform again. I had a backstage pass courtesy of my father's business and it allowed me to meet Michael face to face and have the chance to talk with him. I was so surprised when he asked for my number, I almost fainted. We talked over the next month, fell in love, and starting dating.

     My parents were absolutely against my relationship with Michael. They didn't think it was right for me to be dating a much older man, not to mention a celebrity. I tried to convince her how much I loved him and how much he loved me, but nothing worked. "He's only after sex, and you know it." she screamed at me. Those words still haunt me. She does not know the man I know and love. I just wish in the back of my mind that my family would accept our relationship.

     The media and tabloids are no help at all. They're starting to say things about Michael. His looks, his "odd" behavior, and especially our relationship. And of course, my family believes every word, even when I try to convince them otherwise. 

This is why I've decided to share my story about my love with Michael. 

     As I sat up on my bed, looking over at him, I smiled. He's so beautiful, I love him. I glanced at the clock which read seven-thirty a.m. He has to be at a meeting in two hours. I gently placed my hand on his cheek. I'm not sure why I thought it would wake him, it's almost impossible to wake him. 

"Michael? Baby, it's time to get up." He made a groaning noise and turned on his side, facing me. "No, please, I want to sleep longer." I swear, his morning voice was the sexiest thing ever, besides his looks. I laughed softly and said, "Babe, it's seven-thirty. You have to take a shower, get dressed, eat. It's time to get up." I'm basically his personal alarm clock because if I set one for him, he never hears it. He groaned again, then sat up and coughed. 

"How are you this morning, beautiful?" He asks me that question every morning. He says it's to remind me that I'll always be his girl.

I smiled at him, "I'm fine. How are you?"

"I'm good now." he smiled, then leaned to give me a quick peck on the lips. As he was in the bathroom, I walked to the closet to pick out his clothes. He lets me do this because he knows he takes forever. I picked out his favorite shirt, a light green buttoned down shirt, his black skinny jeans, and his boots. I loved this outfit. I handed him the outfit when he got out of the shower. I had to contain myself. He was soaking wet, with a thin towel around his waist.

"Babe, I love you." I said with a smile, and turned to walk out. He grabbed my hand, pulled me close, and kissed me passionately. Then he looked back at me and said, "I love you too, Peach." That's his nickname for me. When we went on our first date, I wore a peach scented perfume, and he said peaches were his favorite fruit. Ever since then, he's called me Peach.  

     Michael walked out of the bathroom with the aroma of his cologne I bought him. I still fangirl over him some. So I sniffed, and almost fainted. He laughed and sat next to me on the bed. The clock read eight-thirty. "We still have an hour left, why didn't you let me sleep in more?!" he joked. He took my hand and led me to the stairs. Once we were in the kitchen, he told the maid, "The usual, please." He was always so polite to whoever he talked to. Our "usual" breakfast was two plain waffles with orange juice for him, and some Froot Loops and decaf coffee for me. 

     After breakfast, we piled in the limo and headed to his meeting. On the way there, he played his songs, danced a little in his seat, and sang along, not afraid to hit the high notes. I loved watching him dance. As all of his fans are, I'm sure, I'm mesmerized when he dances. I can't take my eyes off of him. He noticed me staring, and said, "How about I teach you some dances, what do ya say?" Most people that don't know me think I know every single Michael Jackson dance step. But I don't.

"Babe, you know I can't dance!" I said laughing.

"But you can moonwalk!" he smiled.

"That's about it though!" I replied. He smiled, took my hand, and played my favorite song of his, Lady In My Life, singing every word while looking me in the eyes. Yes, I love him. He loves me, and swears to it. 

     After his meeting, he took me home. He had to get back to work. Reluctantly, I said goodbye. He took me once more in his arms and kissed me even more passionate than before. Everytime I kiss him, it's even more exciting than the last.

"I love you, Peach," he said softly, making me swoon, "And don't make plans for tonight, I have something special in mind." He smiled at me, kissed me quickly on the cheek, then left. 

     I wasn't sure what to do until he got home so I watched some television. Nothing good is ever on TV anymore. I popped in a favorite movie of mine, Star Wars. I didn't make it thirty minutes into the movie without falling asleep. I awoke hours later to someone massaging my back. I turned over to find Michael smiling at me.

"Hey baby," He kissed me on the forehead.

"Hey," I smiled at him. I had completely forgotten about our special night until he said, "Ready to go?"

I looked at the glowing red numbers on the clock which read ten after seven. "Yeah, lemme freshen up." I walked to the bathroom to put on some make-up and try to comb my bed-head. I put on the perfume that Michael bought me, and some clothes. I put on some skinny jeans, light blue t-shirt, black vest, and my favorite boots. 

"Wow, you look beautiful, Peach." Michael told me smiling. He took my hands and kissed me. I wrapped my arms around him and kissed him back. I could feel his hands running down my back. I put my hands to his face and made my way down to the buttons on his shirt. "No, baby. It's too early in our relationship." he said.

     Disappointed, I looked up at the man I loved. I sighed and walked to the door, Michael following behind. As we walked down the stairs, I said, "So, when am I gonna know the surprise?"

"Soon enough, babe." Michael told me, smiling. As we were walking, I could hear shouts and laughter coming from the living room. 

"Babe?" I looked to Michael. He only had a weird smile on his face. As we approached the doors to the living room, Michael took my hand and said, "Alright babe, you ready to meet the family?"

"Michael! You should've told me earlier! I'm not ready, I look a complete mess!"

"Peach, you look fine!"

"But, your brothers, and sisters...who else is here??"

"Just Mama, and my sisters-in-law. And I can't remember if Jermaine said Joseph was coming..."

Oh shit, I thought. Joseph? He would definitely not like me. I could feel my breakfast coming up. I started shaking, saying, "Baby, I can't do this, not now!"

"You can. I'll be right here with you, holding your hand." Michael opened the doors to the living room. 

     When he opened the doors, my heart beating faster and faster, I looked around at everyone. As I glanced around, I saw Jermaine with his wife, Tito, Marlon, Jackie and Randy. I looked on the other side of the room to see Janet, Rebbie, and LaToya.

"Mikey!" Janet called as she came rushing over to give her big brother a warm hug. 

"Hey Dunk!" he called back. I thought his nickname for his little sister was adorable. "How are you?" 

"I'm doing great! And is this the famous Autumn I've heard so much about?" I looked to Michael and saw him blushing. 

"Yes, Dunk, this is my baby girl whom I love very much." Michael smiled at me. 

"Nice to meet you." I said as I stretched my hand out but found myself embraced in Janet's arms.

"It's nice to finally meet you!" she smiled. "Welcome to the Jackson family!" I turned around to find Michael rough-housing with his brothers. So much for being right there next to me. I couldn't help but smile though because I loved to see him like this, so happy and energized. 

"Oh, well looks like Mikey is doing a great job of introducing you." Janet giggled. She took me by the hand and led me farther into the living room. "Girls, this is Mike's girlfriend, Autumn." I shook Rebbie's hand and LaToya embraced me with a hug. 

"Wow, you are a pretty young thing, aren't you?" LaToya giggled. 

"Well, thank you." I smiled. 

"So where are you from?" Rebbie asked.

"A small town in Nevada, maybe about six hours from here."

"How did you and Mike meet?" asked LaToya.

"Well, I went to his concert about three years ago and met him, but we didn't start talking until about two months ago. Our one month anniversary is next week." I said with a huge grin on my face.

"Come on sweetie, let me introduce you to the boys." Janet took my hand and whisked me away to the other side of the living room. 

"Mikey! You wanna introduce Autumn to the boys or shall I?" Janet smiled as she approached him. Michael gave her a look and took my hand. 

"Guys, this is Autumn, my girl." Again he looked at me and smiled. Jermaine whistled and took a good look at me. I'm very self-conscious and could feel my face reddening. 

"Hi." I squeaked. 

"Woo-wee, Mike. She sure is pretty." Tito commented. I blushed. "So how did you two meet up?" And again I told my story of how I met Michael. Michael and I linked arms and he took me in the kitchen. I saw his mother as he gave her a huge hug. 

"How are you Mama?" 

"Oh I'm fine, dear." I looked at Mrs. Jackson. Her graceful aging could not hide the beauty of her youth. "And this must be Autumn?" she smiled at me.

"Yes, this is my girl, Autumn. Peach, this is the woman who gave me life, my rock, my mother, Katherine." I loved how highly Michael thought of his mother.

"Hello, it's so nice to meet you." I said and shook her hand. 

"It's nice to meet you too dear. Michael, baby, how are you?"

"I'm fine, Mama, really."

"Are you sure? You just haven't seemed yourself since-"

Michael cut her off, "I'm serious, Ma, I'm fine." I questioned the look on Michael's face. For the rest of the evening, we all chatted, laughed and had a great time. Michael's family was sweet, kind and caring and I couldn't have asked for a better time.

       At around eleven pm, after Katherine and the sisters had already gone to bed, Michael announced he was tired. "Oh come on, Mike, that's the oldest trick in the book!" Jermaine called.

"What are you talking about?" he asked.

"Dude, it's only eleven, don't you stay up like til four in the morning? We all know you're ready to heat up the sheets with this girl." Jermaine winked at me. I could feel my face getting hot again.

"I do not." Michael shot back. "Watch your mouth, Jermaine."

He lost his grin and said, "Sorry dude, I didn't know you were still so hung up about this." Now I was interested. 

Michael took me by the hand, gruffly said goodnight to the others and walked out of the room. I was too afraid to ask when I saw the weird look on his face. I had to know what Jermaine was talking about. I contemplated on asking him after Michael had gone to sleep, but I figured he would tell me himself sometime. 

     Days went by, still without Michael telling me what happened the other night. I was worried about him because he wasn't himself. He wasn't eating right and he tossed and turned during the night. He barely spoke to me which of course broke my heart even more. I needed to find out somehow. Tonight, I thought. I'll ask him tonight.

     I had everything in order. As Michael walked in the room, he asked, "Why are the lights off? Peach, are you home?" I turned on the lamp, sexily staring at him. I was wearing some red underwear with bows on the sides and one of my tank tops. 

"Peach...?" 

"Shhh, don't talk," I said seductively. "I've noticed you haven't been yourself lately, and I want you to unwind." I smiled at him.

"But I...mmmm." he sighed as I rubbed his back. He started caressing me with his hands as I started to take off my bra. He was kissing me, telling me I was beautiful. Oh, I wanted him so bad. I could feel his hot breath on my neck. He made a grunting noise and stopped. "Peach, not now." And my excitement faded. I looked up at him disappointed and said, "Baby, please. I want you to forget what's been going on lately."

"What's been going on?" He raised an eyebrow at me.

"Well, about what Jermaine said the other night, you haven't been yourself." I said timidly. Michael looked at me questioningly. 

"I haven't?" his anger started to rise. "I've been just fine!" he shouted. "There's not a damn thing wrong with me!" 

I looked away, hot tears forming in my eyes. He has never raised his voice with me. He brushed past me and locked himself in the bathroom. I slowly walked to the closet and put on my pajamas, the tears coming fast now. I sat in the lawn chairs on our balcony and thought of what just happened. I was still confused, shocked, and scared. I loved Michael, but when he shouted at me, it made me scared and angry as well.

     I turned around to see he was still in the bathroom, even after fifteen minutes. I thought I should knock on the door, but what if he was still mad? So I sat in the chair looking over Neverland lit up. It's like a dream living here. I felt a hand take mine and looked up to find Michael, his eyes red from crying. He stood me upright and wrapped his arms around me. I collapsed into his chest and put my arms around him, tears running down my cheeks again. We stood there in each other's embrace for about five minutes. He looked down at me and said softly, "Peach, I am so sorry I shouted at you. I should've never..."

I put my finger up to his lips and said, "Babe, I'm sorry. I shouldn't have approached it that way. I should've let you tell me on your own, when you were ready." He only looked at me. He took my face in his hands and gave me the most passionate kiss I've ever experienced. He took my hands and led me to the bed. He sat me down and started to explain.

"I was ten years old. We had just started to get big, after being signed to Motown. After a concert we did in downtown Gary, we went to an after party. When I was there, I saw this girl and thought she was so beautiful. But just when I got the courage to talk to her, my mother took me by the hand. It was after our bedtime and she said we had to go home. I thought I would never see her again. I didn't know her name, or where she was from, but I knew I loved her. It turned out that I saw her at a concert sitting in the front row. I remember I was so nervous. I got the chance to talk to her afterwards and she asked for my number. We were bestfriends and did everything together. We ended up dating when I was nineteen. She told me I was her best friend and nothing more. Afterwards, she took me back to her house and in her bedroom. She eventually seduced me and we had sex. For an entire month, I didn't hear from her. I was so ashamed and felt it was all my fault. But she called me one night and told me she was pregnant. I was excited but also scared. For the next five months, I did everything for her. I made a baby room at her new apartment, complete with crib, toys, clothes, and diapers. One night when I was home, she called me again. She broke the news to me that I wasn't the father. It broke my heart because I was ready. We had already picked out a name and I had decorated the room myself. I was speechless as I hung up the phone. I never talked to her again."

     By this time, I was crying. I felt sorry for him. I felt angry with myself for trying to force it out of him by seducing him. Oh how I could just kick myself. I held him in my arms as he cried silently. I was silent also. I didn't know what to say, what could I say? We lay on the bed with his head on my chest as I held him and rubbed his back. 

     After about ten minutes he looked at me with red eyes and said, "I really hope you understand."

"Of course, baby. I'll never try to be that way anymore. I could never, ever do that to you. Just thinking of hurting you kills me inside."

"Thank you so much. I love you, Peach."

"I love you too Michael." 

And then we fell asleep in each other's arms.

"Michael?" No answer. I called again, "Michael?" but he was gone. I couldn't believe it. I screamed. My world, my love, my Michael was gone. I rocked him in my arms, crying. But it felt so real.

"Peach! Wake up!" I awoke with a start to his sweet voice calling me.

I immediately started crying and hugging him, saying, "Oh God, it was a nightmare!"

"It was just a dream baby, what was it about?"

"You were gone, it felt so real, it felt so real," I kept saying.

"Baby, I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere, look at me," I looked into his soft brown eyes. "I'm here. I'm here." he said soothingly. He rocked me back in forth in his arms until I fell asleep again. Luckily, I didn't have any more dreams. 

     I woke up promptly at nine o clock, Michael still sleeping beside me. I got out of bed to go to the balcony. It was a beautiful sunny morning at Neverland. The birds singing, the animals just waking up, and sun just over the mountains. It was breathtaking. When I first came to Neverland, I knew I wanted to stay for as long as I live. The rides, the animals, the water balloon and water gun fights, the scenery; it's all just perfect. I felt a hand on my shoulder.

"Autumn? Are you okay, baby?" Michael asked.

"Yeah, why?"

"Don't you remember your dream?"

I could feel tears in my eyes. Any thought for me at all of Michael leaving makes me cry. "Yeah, how could I forget?" I choked. He embraced me in a warm hug.

"Try, just try. It's not healthy to hold onto stuff that makes you sad."

"Yeah," I said. "I'll try." I walked to the bathroom to make-do with my messy hair. I decided to just get a shower instead. Normally, I leave the bathroom door open so it won't get so hot, but Michael came and closed it. It made me wonder. What did I do? Does he not love me that way? It made me sad, so I took a thirty minute shower. When I got out, I took my time getting dressed and putting on make-up.

When I opened the door, Michael was in the closet picking out his clothes. "Hey," I said. "Why did you close the door? I always leave it open." 

He didn't answer me, he just had a weird look.

"Michael?" I said, throwing my pajamas on the bed. 

"We can't...do that." he said, almost whispering.

"Can't do what?"

"Leave the door open any more."

Okay, I was puzzled. "Um, why?" I questioned.

"I don't want you to tempt me." he looked me in the eyes.

"I wasn't trying to, babe. I was just getting a shower."

"I know, but I'm a guy. It'll tempt me no matter what."

I was wondering what to say. How could I answer that? I said, "Well, we can help those temptations..." I said sexily walking towards him. I put my arms around his waist and gave him a kiss on the neck. He retreated backwards saying, "No, no. Not now. We've only been dating a month, baby. You're only seventeen, think of the press and media if they found out you were pregnant or something. Hell, think of what your family would say!" 

"Fuck my family! I couldn't give a rat's ass what the hell they think. I only want you." He looked at me, smiling. "What?" I asked.

"You." was all he said. He took my face in his hands and kissed me, wrapping his arms around me and putting one hand on my back, while the other stroking my hair. He knows my weaknesses, damn it. So many people don't know that Michael is extremely romantic. 

"Alright, I have rehearsals today, you want to come or stay?" he asked.

"I wanna come this time." I said excitedly. He looked at me smiling and took me by the hand. When we arrived at the civic center, he took me around and let me meet everybody. The drummer, guitarist, bassist, and backup singers and dancers. He took me to my seat and then he started up. For the next three hours, I watched him sing, dance, instruct, and choreograph. He was a true genius when it came to entertainment. Every once in awhile, he would look at me and smile or blow me a kiss. 

     When we got home, I laid down in the bed next to Michael. He was so tired and fell asleep within minutes. I wish I knew then that the next day would change my life forever.

     When I woke up, I heard the shower running. The thoughts from the previous day ran through my head. What if you get pregnant? I was only seventeen, and I loved kids almost as much as I loved Michael. But I still couldn't take the thought of being a mother just yet. I wanted Michael. So bad. I thought of the preventions of becoming pregnant. Condoms, birth control, stuff like that. I decided while Michael was was rehearsing, I would run down to the nearest drug store and buy some. 

     I got up and walked to the closet when Michael opened the bathroom door. "Morning, beautiful." he cooed.

"Morning, Michael." I answered. I picked through his clothes and got a few outfits for him to change into. "Here's a white shirt you can wear if you get too hot. Don't overwork yourself, okay?" I said.

"When have I overworked myself?"

"Everyday!" I laughed. "Babe, you work too hard. You come home tired and out of breath, you need to take it slow." 

"Babe, you gotta get to know me. I've been working like this ever since I was five. I'm used to it, it's in my nature."

"Whatever you say Michael." I said as he took the shirt and planted a quick kiss on my lips. 

"So you coming or staying today sweetheart?"

"I think I'll stay this time. I'm gonna clean up a little."

"Aw, okay. I'll miss you baby." he said and took me in his arms and kissed me. 

"I'll miss you too." I replied. 

     After he was gone, I called a close friend I've known practically since I was in diapers. He's almost like a brother to me. A familiar voice answered on the other line, "Hello?"

"Sup stranger?" I smiled.

"Autumn! How are you? I haven't talked to you in months!"

"It's been too long! I'm great, everything's perfect. And you?"

"Oh you know, the same ole thing. So what's up?"

I hesitated. Cory and I have been through a lot, but I've never asked him anything this personal. "I was wondering if you could help me with something. I'm too afraid to do it alone."

"Well sure, anything, what is it?" he answered.

I paused again, "Uummm, I need you to go the the drug store with me..." I trailed off.

"Okayyy," he answered sounding puzzled. "What time?"

"Gimme an hour?" 

"Sounds cool, later." and he hung up the phone. I was still nervous as to how he would react to me buying condoms. But at least I'm being safe.

     After I showered, fixed my hair, and did make-up, I jogged down the stairs to grab a quick bite to eat. "What are you all dressed up fo, chile?" Mrs. Kai, the chef, called.

"I'm going to meet a friend. If I'm not back by the time Michael is home, just tell him to call me."

"Sure thang, sweetie." she smiled. I loved her deep Georgia accent. I grabbed my keys and drove to the store. Cory was already there waiting for me. He smiled as I pulled up. "Hey, girl!" he gave me a huge hug. "So, why am I here?" 

I could feel my face getting hot. "Umm," He looked me in the eyes. "Yes?" I motioned for him to get closer. "I'm going to buy some condoms..." I whispered. He didn't say anything, just had this smirk on his face and then smiled at me. 

He finally said, "Well, let's go." I seriously figured he would protest, or yell, or get angry because I was young, but to my surprise, he took my hand and led me through the aisle. He took me to the back to a large selection of different brands. I saw Trojan, Durex, Crown, and so many more. What should I choose, what's the difference? I don't even know what size! 

     Cory studied me as I looked at the different colored boxes. "I think you should get a large Trojan, they're the best." he said suddenly. What?? I thought. Oh shit, I hope he didn't mean I was buying them for us! My face grew red again. 

"H-how would you know?" I stammered.

"Well," he whispered to me, "I'm a large. And it feels the best for the ladies...so I've heard." Yep, that's exactly what he thought. Damn boys and they're hormones, all the time horny. I calmly explained that they were for me and Michael. He kind of looked over my shoulder, embarrassed. "I'm sorry, I really am." 

I couldn't help but laugh. "It's okay."

"But you're only seventeen." And there's where the big protective brother comes out in him. 

"I know, but at least I'm being precautionary, right?"

"Condoms don't always work 100% of the time, you know."

"That's why I need birth control also. That's another thing, I want you to come to the doctor with me, please?" I gave my best sad puppy dog look. 

He gave me a look then said, "Fine..." 

"Yay!" I hugged him. I grabbed the every size of the Trojans just to be safe. I paid for them and me and and Cory piled into my car and headed to the doctor.

"So why not just buy birth control over the counter at a pharmacy?" Cory questioned.

"Well, to be honest, I haven't had a check up in about two years, and I wanted to be safe." When we arrived at the doctor and checked in, we sat in the waiting room. I noticed a magazine with Michael's face on the cover and picked it up. 

"So you really love him, don't you?" Cory smiled.

"With everything I have." I answered honestly.

A nurse opened the door and called, "Jackson, Autumn?" I got up and followed the nurse to a room at the end of a hall. I sat down on the patient's table while she asked me some questions. The doctor came in shortly afterwards. "Wow, Autumn, I haven't seen you around in awhile." she said warmly.

"I know, I'm sorry." I answered sheepishly. 

"So what have we got here?" She  instructed me to lie down with my legs open. She asked me a few questions then said, "I think we need to do a quick internal examination." She stuck two fingers inside and said, "I need to run an ultrasound real quick." She left and came back with an odd looking machine which she placed just above my private area. When she was done, she took the machine and left. About fifteen minutes went by when she came back and had a weird look on her face. It made me have a sick feeling, like something was wrong. "What is it?" I said nervously. 

She sat down next to me and took my hand. "I'm not sure how to say this." My heart was beating fast now. "You have Pelvic Inflammatory Disease. It's caused when bacteria and other germs push their way up into your vagina. It also means," she paused, "you won't be able to bear children." I could feel my heart drop all the way to my stomach. I felt dizzy and uncomfortable. I sat back against the wall and began to cry. I didn't even know how it was going to be brought up to Michael. What if he wouldn't love me the way he does now? What if he leaves me? The doctor gave me a quick hug then left the room. "I'll let you have some alone time." she said

     I sat on the bed for ten minutes crying my eyes out. How could this happen to me? Why me? I thought over and over. Why me? After I gathered myself, I walked out the the office and back to my car, Cory following behind. I explained everything to him. "Wow, I am so sorry." he said sympathetically. I buried my face in his chest as he held me close.

     After I took Cory home, I sat in my car outside Neverland, just thinking. It was now ten after eight. Michael would be home in a few hours. I dreaded telling him, but I had to. I took the condoms and stuffed them under the seat. I walked up the steps and opened the door. To my surprise, I saw Michael standing in the hallway, his eyes red from crying. He didn't say anything, just came up to me and embraced me with a hug. I wondered how he found out, or if he was sad about something completely different. Either way, I started crying again. He took my hand and led me up the stairs to our room.

     He looked me in the eyes and softly said, "Your friend called me and told me." Oh my God! I cannot believe him! For some reason I became angry. I was going to tell him myself! I started crying again in a fit of anger and sadness. Michael held me close. 

"Peach, I know this is hard. It's hard for me too. But we can get through this. It'll be awhile before we even start thinking of having a family. So don't worry about it, okay?"

"How can you be so calm, Michael?!" I yelled. "I cannot bear children of my own! Do you know how that makes me feel?!"

He had tears in his eyes. "I know Peach. I know it's hard. But you can't beat yourself up about this. Maybe this is God's plan for your life and you'll learn a valuable lesson." He held me close once more as I cried into his chest. "And besides, you're only seventeen. You've got your entire life to worry about other things. You know there's other options also. Adoption, surrogate, anything." 

"But just knowing that I'm not the biological mother of my children breaks my heart." I whispered. 

"I know baby. But sperm and egg isn't what makes the mother and father. It's love, compassion, kindness, discipline, and caring for the child that makes the parent." I guess he was right. It was still too early and it hurt too much to think about this just yet. 

     We changed into our pajamas and fell fast asleep in each other's arms.