Date: Jun 02, 2016 08:00 pm Title: Chapter 5
Finally getting a chance to read this story and I LOVE it! Ugh... Lisa though... Here we go... LOL
I can completely understand Michael's attitude towards Kenya right now though because I mean as serious as this case is, why would he want to be bothered with some student. He needed all the professionals he could get!
I need MORE!!!! Now!!!
Please & Thanks
Lol "why would he want to be bothered with some student".
More is finally here! I hope you continue to read!
Date: Jun 02, 2016 12:53 pm Title: Chapter 5
About time I got around to giving this one a review. ;)
Anyways, the pros: The writing really works, you convey yourself and the characters well. I'm more than happy to read a story where the female lead isn't instantly smitten with Michael. Kenya's behavior feels very natural, and she is shaping up to be a likable, relatable character. I especially love the fact that she is trying to keep herself removed from the case, not taking sides and just doing her job. It adds an extra dimension to her and is very refreshing. I also enjoy the way you characterized Michael. You show the effect the allegations are having on him without going too out there and making it seem like a different person entirely. Since Lisa has just barely been introduced, I can't say much about her yet, although I'm quite curious about her and her motivations now. You've definitely piqued my curiosity. :)
The cons: There are a few errors, mostly in punctuation and wording, but overall it's still readable and doesn't detract from the story. The last scene of Chapter 5 where he visits the kids kind of threw me off, though. I'm not as well-versed in the history of the allegations as I probably should be, but wouldn't an event like that be discouraged in light of the accusations? I understand that the scene exists for a reason, but I am kind of questioning the logic of Michael/his people/the organizers of the event and the parents of the children attending if they thought it was a good idea.
Overall, I'm so far interested in the story and invested in the characters. I hope you continue this story, and I wish you luck. Write on!
I really appreciate your support for this story and this review was a-maze-ing, lol.
I actually thought about just having the fund raiser with adults only and not include the kids from the orphanage, but then I thought about it. I figured that even though he was going through the allegations he still wouldn't allow it to take away him giving to the children. The fund raiser was for sick children so I thought involving the kids would be a good idea. I'm pretty sure Michael's people advised against it, but I don't think he would've wanted to cancel it or not show up for the simple fact that it was for the sick kids. I also believe that not everyone believed the allegations against Michael. He still had millions of people who found him innocent. All in all though I struggled with how I wanted to do the scene, but now what's done is done, so? But I totally appreciate the cons that you listed, they were a great help!
I hope you continue to read on!
Date: Mar 18, 2016 05:49 pm Title: Chapter 1
Awww man I could only imagine what Michael went through especially in real life 😞 We all know he didn't do it and he had to endure this boy once but twice. People are so cruel n would do anything for money. However, I do like the way this is starting! Great job girl! As a fellow write on here, I like ur writing style already.
Thank you girl, I appreciate it!
Date: Mar 14, 2016 04:53 am Title: Chapter 3
I'm loving this story! Fast paced, inviting, feels as if you're there watching everything unfold. Keep it coming! Very stressful time in MJ's life, I can't imagine. Can't wait for Chapter 4!
Aww, I really appreciate it! I hope you enjoy chapter four!